I must have somehow missed the memo that today was "leave your house wearing your pajama pants" day.
I kinda get why teenagers do it. Maybe it's a fashion statement. Teenagers are the ONLY ones, in my opinion, who CAN get away with wearing pajamas outside their houses.
I, however, saw two different grown women wearing fleece pajama pants at the grocery store.
I'm going to hazard a guess to say the first lady had an excuse, because she was likely clinically crazy. She had about 40 cans of cat food, a bag of dog food, and a snickers bar in her purchase. I'm not saying cat people are nuts, but based on her purchase, and her conversation with the cashier ("Miss Kitty likes this type of food, but I have to sneak in some other types too to make sure she has a well-balanced diet") I'd say she's the quintessential cat lady who lives alone in an apartment with 5 or 6 cats and makes them wear sweaters and treats them like her grandchildren. (Did I mention she was in her 60s?)
She also smelled like pot. She may not have been crazy, but just stoned. I can't say for sure, but the combination of these elements excused her, in my book, for wearing pajamas outside her house.
The second girl, I saw walking in as I was leaving. If you are over the age of 12, you should NOT be wearing "My Little Pony" pajamas. Especially OUT of your HOUSE. But, she wore them proudly, strutting into the grocery store with (presumably) her devoted boyfriend hanging on her arm. She looked to be in her 30s.
A) What self-respecting woman would wear My Little Pony PJs?
B) What self-respecting woman would wear them in public?
C) What self-respecting man would be seen with a woman who would wear that in public?
D) WHY!?
I do not claim to be a fashionista by any means. I'm lucky to remember to match my shoes to my outfit every day. But I do know better than to leave my house looking like I LITERALLY just rolled out of bed.
Which leads me to my next topic.
All criminals smell the same. (I am a civilian employee for a police department, in case you are wondering)
All of them have this same, ripe, "foot rubbed on a butt" smell. Close your eyes and repeat that phrase. It says it all.
That smell can permeate a small building in a matter of minutes. (Especially when they're required to remove their shoes while in the holding cell) It clings to your clothes, your hair, and the hairs in your nostrils. It's miserable.
So, out of curiousity, I asked a police officer WHY they all smell the same. I was told this:
"They don't go home and put on pajamas. They likely sleep in whatever they're wearing. You're smelling days of just going somewhere and laying down their head. Baths are not a regular thing, because they don't likely have a permanent place to stay."
The girl that walked by me going into the grocery store had that "foot on a butt" smell to her. Which made me come full circle to realize that a) she'd probably worn those same pajamas for days; and b) she could possibly be a criminal.
I left before I could get my confirmation. Hopefully she was going to buy soap, or deodorant or perfume or SOMETHING.
~CSM
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